I have never felt comfortable in a pool. Scratch that, there have two times in my life that I have felt comfortable swimming and they were both at Noah's Ark circa 1995. Every time I get into the pool all I can think about is wanting to get out. Every break in between laps is a battle for me to push off again. I just dont like it. I get claustrophobic and I forget how to breath, then if I take in water when Im trying to breath I might as well just go ahead and drown, it freaks me out so much.
I really wanted to like swimming, I have tried very hard to read, watch and learn about it so that maybe someday I could unlock some secret door that allowed me to fall in love with the sport. After two winters of trying I am struggling to see the appeal.
Sure, it is amazing fitness and really should be part of every ones workout, you know, once a month or so. Even considering the health benefits and my desire to compete in Triathlons again, I still cant get into it. I want to, mostly. I would love to jump into the pool and just feel free, to float and enjoy myself, to play beneath the tiny waves and love the cool sensation on my skin. I would really like that. But I cant go more than 3 feet underwater without my ears being crushed by the pressure and my eyes starting to hurt.
I have dived into the deep end of pools from boards and gone too deep, so much so that the instant pressure change makes me feel like I will explode. My head hurts for hours afterward and if I think about it real hard I can conjure the pain even on dry land. It sucks.
I dont think it comes from anything, having ear problems as a kid and whatnot, its just part of my anatomy. Going up and down small hills in my car will cause my ears to pop when other people have no change. Coming down from altitude in a plane can bring me to tears it hurts so bad and for so long. Sometimes after a flight I will have an ear ache for an entire day it gets so bad.
I dont know what Im trying to get it here, I had a bad day at the pool and this is the first sport or athletic thing that I have even been poor at and really dont like. It's too bad I need it to be part of my life for some of my stupid goals.
Iron Man by the time Im 30, good luck.
But I push forward. I keep getting back into that damn pool, sometimes just for 10-15 min, and force myself to do it. I dont think Im getting any better and I really dont like it any more but if I dont keep at it I will never, ever, succeed.
Feb 23, 2011
Feb 20, 2011
This is it?
One week ago today I got hurt. I am still hurt. I was playing slow soccer in my old man league, we play in the wonderful new facility with 3 small sized fields and an artificial surface. I dont blame the turf, this would have happened anywhere.
There are times when you fall down and get right back up, then there are times where you think you may need surgery and a cart to get you off the ground. This was a the latter. I was running at full speed and reached out with my right foot to block a shot, the ball hit me right in the pinky toe of my right foot forcing it to angle in and down towards the ground. My next step was not good, I landed on the outside of my foot, full body weight and running. There was a pop, a shooting pain and then the ground.
This is the kind of injury that doesnt actually hurt right away, you have the hot sensation letting you know that you've gotten it wrong followed closely by the throbbing of the swelled tissue and the rush of blood. As I lay on the ground, in the middle of the field, my first though was about running. Then broken legs, surgery, pain, money, getting home... I was so worried that in this one split second I had ruined an entire season of running that hadnt even begun yet. That somehow this crash landing would upset the next 8 months of my life so much that I couldnt possibly enjoy being on my feet. Im on my feet all day every day.
My job. I manage a restaurant, this means I am on my feet all day everyday and have no ability to rest a hurt ankle. Had I a sitting job I would be healing much faster, but it has now been officially one week and I am still limping. I dont have as much pain as when it started, but there is still some significant swelling and a little bruise left. Good thing it just snowed 6 inches.
What I was, and am, scared about is the lingering pain. What if this is that one injury that always keeps me down. So many adults (late 30-40) have the 'knee problem' or the 'back pain' that keeps flaring up in their lives. What if that's me? What if this one little step just screws me for the next 30 years. I dont know what Ill do.
I dont think this will be the case, its just a bad sprain, but that thought is always sitting in the back on my mind.
So now I wait, I dont take any pain killers or anti-inflammatory stuff (on principle) and I get on with my daily. I havnt tried to really use it at all, I havnt run or jumped yet so as to give the most time to heal possible. I would love to go to the gym and left, or swim but I know that one wrong move and I could seriously end my summer. Ill wait and give it a few more days and even another week, that way I can be certain.
My training will have to wait.
There are times when you fall down and get right back up, then there are times where you think you may need surgery and a cart to get you off the ground. This was a the latter. I was running at full speed and reached out with my right foot to block a shot, the ball hit me right in the pinky toe of my right foot forcing it to angle in and down towards the ground. My next step was not good, I landed on the outside of my foot, full body weight and running. There was a pop, a shooting pain and then the ground.
This is the kind of injury that doesnt actually hurt right away, you have the hot sensation letting you know that you've gotten it wrong followed closely by the throbbing of the swelled tissue and the rush of blood. As I lay on the ground, in the middle of the field, my first though was about running. Then broken legs, surgery, pain, money, getting home... I was so worried that in this one split second I had ruined an entire season of running that hadnt even begun yet. That somehow this crash landing would upset the next 8 months of my life so much that I couldnt possibly enjoy being on my feet. Im on my feet all day every day.
My job. I manage a restaurant, this means I am on my feet all day everyday and have no ability to rest a hurt ankle. Had I a sitting job I would be healing much faster, but it has now been officially one week and I am still limping. I dont have as much pain as when it started, but there is still some significant swelling and a little bruise left. Good thing it just snowed 6 inches.
What I was, and am, scared about is the lingering pain. What if this is that one injury that always keeps me down. So many adults (late 30-40) have the 'knee problem' or the 'back pain' that keeps flaring up in their lives. What if that's me? What if this one little step just screws me for the next 30 years. I dont know what Ill do.
I dont think this will be the case, its just a bad sprain, but that thought is always sitting in the back on my mind.
So now I wait, I dont take any pain killers or anti-inflammatory stuff (on principle) and I get on with my daily. I havnt tried to really use it at all, I havnt run or jumped yet so as to give the most time to heal possible. I would love to go to the gym and left, or swim but I know that one wrong move and I could seriously end my summer. Ill wait and give it a few more days and even another week, that way I can be certain.
My training will have to wait.
Feb 8, 2011
I am the worst Blogger on the Planet
Three years. Three freaking years since I have written anything in here. You know whats happened in those three years? A whole lot of running that I should have put down here when it was fresh in my mind.
For all the running I have done in my life and where this blog started, I didnt actually get out and do my first race until September of 09. It was a charity 5k that I did with my friends. It took place along the Mississippi river in NE Minneapolis, the morning was a wonderful 60 degrees and there was no wind. This was a very small race, maybe 1500 people at the VERY most, I wouldnt be surprised if it was just 1200. It was put on by a local radio morning show to help raise money for the Special Olympics, whats not to like for a first race?
Now, a 5K is nothing special, it is something anyone can set out just a few weeks or a month before and complete. You wont be competitive but a 5K is a good place to start and a good run/walk race for a beginner. I finished 6th in class and 15th overall. I dont remember my time, somewhere around 22min. The winners of this race for both male and female finished in under 18min.
I have never run a sub 20min 5K.
I then took to a Thanks giving day 5K through the streets of downtown Minneapolis. This race was crazy and I was very glad it wasnt my first outing. I had heard stories and seen pictures of the starting lines of big races, but I was not prepared for this level of mania. This race is a very popular one, yearly entrants total into the 10's of thousands and the organizers shut down some very major streets of downtown. I was dwarfed by the sheer numbers of people and felt like a fish swimming in a school for the first 1.5 miles.
This was not my best race. It was so hard to run and stick with a pace of comfort, be it slower or faster, youre pretty much just running with whoever is around you and at their pace. I finished sub-25min but never felt good or confident for the entire race. I was very glad it was not my first race.
There have since been a handful of 10ks, a 5 miler all off-road, a Triathlon (that requires its own blog entry) and a soaking wet 1/2 Marathon that I didnt train for.
My friends and I all signed up for the Red, White and Boom 4th of July 1/2 Marathon in the beginning of June. I figured since I had no problems running 5-6 and 7 miles that jumping up to 13 wouldnt be that big of a deal. The weeks leading up to the race I started thinking about my diet a little and did some light, slow, distance work. Nothing fancy, just some things to keep me occupied. One week before I decided to see what a 13 mile run felt like, I mapped out a good run on google and set out one rainy cool afternoon. with my 13.5ish mile rout plotted I set out.
I started quick, running smooth 7min miles and grabbing a bit of water along the way at fountains, I spent most of the first half just trying to get out of my head a bit and let the running just happen. This was all well and good until the turn around point.
What I didnt learn from google was miles 6, 7, 8 and 9 where very hilly, so much so that by my turn back point I was sucking wind pretty hard. I took a 30 sec break to adjust my laces and grab some water before heading back home, back through the hills again. It was brutal. Not only was I getting extremely tired but the rain had picked up and I was 6 miles from home and only my feet to get me there.
Mile 10 almost killed me.
There is a point people talk about, the Wall, the point at which your brain just says 'stop the non-sense'. It is at this stage that people rely on their training to push them through, the muscle memory of having been there before, having pushed these limits and climbing through to the other side. I had none of that. I was in virgin territory and running myself out of hydration and fuel with every step.
It was at mile 10 and 11 that I learned a lot about myself and the amount of strength it takes to truly be a distance runner. I learned that my nonchalance towards athletics and lack of real training was good enough for the odd top 10 finish at a 10K and going out for a slow 5 mile with your friends but it was not good enough for the long run. I was under nourished and under prepared and I had a big mountain to climb in just 7 days time.
I finished my first 1/2 Marathon in 1hr 54min. I was exhausted, hurt and trailing behind a woman who had had brain and breast cancer surgery 9 months earlier (her shirt told me about her story). I was not ready and it showed.
I pretty much took the rest of the summer off. After a nice Holiday in Germany and a hot month of August I was down to about 10 miles a week and not looking forward to any more. And thats pretty much where we are today, thinking, planning and gearing up for a soon to approach spring training season.
I have yet to pull the trigger on a full Marathon, something I hope to accomplish this summer or fall. I think if I just sign up for one and get it on my schedule that in the end I will just do it. My experience with the 1/2 really showed me that I will need to fully rethink my strategy on fuel and training, something I actually look forward to. These are the two things I do best in life, sports and food. Now is just as good a time as any to get my shit together and really learn something about myself.
For all the running I have done in my life and where this blog started, I didnt actually get out and do my first race until September of 09. It was a charity 5k that I did with my friends. It took place along the Mississippi river in NE Minneapolis, the morning was a wonderful 60 degrees and there was no wind. This was a very small race, maybe 1500 people at the VERY most, I wouldnt be surprised if it was just 1200. It was put on by a local radio morning show to help raise money for the Special Olympics, whats not to like for a first race?
Now, a 5K is nothing special, it is something anyone can set out just a few weeks or a month before and complete. You wont be competitive but a 5K is a good place to start and a good run/walk race for a beginner. I finished 6th in class and 15th overall. I dont remember my time, somewhere around 22min. The winners of this race for both male and female finished in under 18min.
I have never run a sub 20min 5K.
I then took to a Thanks giving day 5K through the streets of downtown Minneapolis. This race was crazy and I was very glad it wasnt my first outing. I had heard stories and seen pictures of the starting lines of big races, but I was not prepared for this level of mania. This race is a very popular one, yearly entrants total into the 10's of thousands and the organizers shut down some very major streets of downtown. I was dwarfed by the sheer numbers of people and felt like a fish swimming in a school for the first 1.5 miles.
This was not my best race. It was so hard to run and stick with a pace of comfort, be it slower or faster, youre pretty much just running with whoever is around you and at their pace. I finished sub-25min but never felt good or confident for the entire race. I was very glad it was not my first race.
There have since been a handful of 10ks, a 5 miler all off-road, a Triathlon (that requires its own blog entry) and a soaking wet 1/2 Marathon that I didnt train for.
My friends and I all signed up for the Red, White and Boom 4th of July 1/2 Marathon in the beginning of June. I figured since I had no problems running 5-6 and 7 miles that jumping up to 13 wouldnt be that big of a deal. The weeks leading up to the race I started thinking about my diet a little and did some light, slow, distance work. Nothing fancy, just some things to keep me occupied. One week before I decided to see what a 13 mile run felt like, I mapped out a good run on google and set out one rainy cool afternoon. with my 13.5ish mile rout plotted I set out.
I started quick, running smooth 7min miles and grabbing a bit of water along the way at fountains, I spent most of the first half just trying to get out of my head a bit and let the running just happen. This was all well and good until the turn around point.
What I didnt learn from google was miles 6, 7, 8 and 9 where very hilly, so much so that by my turn back point I was sucking wind pretty hard. I took a 30 sec break to adjust my laces and grab some water before heading back home, back through the hills again. It was brutal. Not only was I getting extremely tired but the rain had picked up and I was 6 miles from home and only my feet to get me there.
Mile 10 almost killed me.
There is a point people talk about, the Wall, the point at which your brain just says 'stop the non-sense'. It is at this stage that people rely on their training to push them through, the muscle memory of having been there before, having pushed these limits and climbing through to the other side. I had none of that. I was in virgin territory and running myself out of hydration and fuel with every step.
It was at mile 10 and 11 that I learned a lot about myself and the amount of strength it takes to truly be a distance runner. I learned that my nonchalance towards athletics and lack of real training was good enough for the odd top 10 finish at a 10K and going out for a slow 5 mile with your friends but it was not good enough for the long run. I was under nourished and under prepared and I had a big mountain to climb in just 7 days time.
I finished my first 1/2 Marathon in 1hr 54min. I was exhausted, hurt and trailing behind a woman who had had brain and breast cancer surgery 9 months earlier (her shirt told me about her story). I was not ready and it showed.
I pretty much took the rest of the summer off. After a nice Holiday in Germany and a hot month of August I was down to about 10 miles a week and not looking forward to any more. And thats pretty much where we are today, thinking, planning and gearing up for a soon to approach spring training season.
I have yet to pull the trigger on a full Marathon, something I hope to accomplish this summer or fall. I think if I just sign up for one and get it on my schedule that in the end I will just do it. My experience with the 1/2 really showed me that I will need to fully rethink my strategy on fuel and training, something I actually look forward to. These are the two things I do best in life, sports and food. Now is just as good a time as any to get my shit together and really learn something about myself.
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